Q&A with Helena Hawthorn

What do you think of Doppelganger?

I don’t know what to think of her. I don’t even know who or what she is. Sometimes, I wonder if that’s my sub-conscience talking back to me, but she seems to know a lot more about everything that is going on than I do. That knowledge unsettles me.

What is the most annoying thing you find in Alexander?

His ability to find faults in everything I do and say. I don’t know what I did wrong. Honestly, I don’t even think I did, nor had the time to do anything to him. Whatever his problem with me is, I doubt he’ll tell me over a cup of coffee.

Whom you trust the most?

I don’t know how to answer this either. Myself? Then again, I can’t even trust myself after what had happened at Reaver’s. As more time passes, the less I feel that I know about the world and myself. It’s frightening to lose control of my body and wake up to dead bodies everywhere. And then there is that eerie feeling of joy when I forced Lucious and Alexander to kneel before me…

Do you want to break the soul-bond?

At first, yes, I wanted to break it and forget about the whole ordeal. I wanted to return to normal and pretend that none of the supernatural ever existed. But, I can no longer do that. With every passing day, I am drawn towards Lucious by an unnatural pull. Whether it is because we are two parts of the same soul or because of the link – I am not sure. All I know is that when we spent the night together, I felt happy. I wanted to be there with him.

What is the sexiest thing you find in Lucious?

Honestly? Probably the accent. Every time I hear his unique English accent it sends shivers down my spine and I just want to wrap myself in it. Does that make sense? Is that weird?

What is your pass time?

It used to listen to classical music a lot. I love how it flows; gently surrounds you with its warm blanket and protects you from the outside world. You should try it. My favourites would be:

Baroque: “Prelude No. 1 in C major”,
Beethoven: “Sonata No. 14 in C-sharp minor”.
Chopin: “Prelude Op. 28 No. 15 in D-flat major” and “Etude Op. 10 No.3 in E-major”.

You’re a girl who talks to an angel what does a girl like you even do for fun?

I can’t remember what ‘fun’ is to be honest. Every time I think I’m about to get some peace and quiet, something else happens and I have to deal with it. Sometimes, I swear the universe is against me. Well, now that Lazarus is out of my life, I will at least try to finish a few of the books I have wanted read. As for Michael … he has a lot of questions to answer.

Don’t you miss your college?

Do I miss lecturers nattering away for an hour at a time and trying not to fall asleep from their monotone droning? Do I miss the assignments or the endless amounts of material I have to learn? To be honest, I would probably pick studying over jumping through Demon Gates or being strangled by a vampire. So, the answer would be… sometimes.

Do you think you and Lucious will be together again?

I don’t know what to think. I try not to wish for too much with how we parted. He knocked me out for goodness sake! After saying that he would let me choose my path, he just ignored my wish to stay with Maya. At the same time, I want to be close. Not being able to communicate with him through the link is odd. I miss the closeness we had in Vienna. Then again, I may have been imagining things.

I know you care about Laura and she is your friend…what will you do if she tried to hurt Lucious or Andrew?

Just imagining that scenario hurts my heart. I owe Laura a lot. She was the person who brought me out and was my first good friend in school. After that, Andrew joined our group and we were inseparable since. Because of what happened to her parents, I … I feel guilty. I should have been the one to go in. I should have been there to stop them. Their death is on me and because of that I owe Laura a lot more than I can give her. So, I do hope there won’t come a time when she hurts either of them. Every one of them is very important to me. I hope you understand that.

Where would you like to spend the rest of your life?

Somewhere where I don’t have to worry about survival. If you meant a location … I always dreamt of going to Paris – the city of romance. First, I have to find someone to go there with though… and maybe learn French.

What was your first impression about Lucious?

When I met him on the street? It was something along the lines of “those eyes can see through me”. I guess you could say that I felt like I was under observation. He was very secretive, kept to himself – much like Alexander, I think. During the past month, I am glad he started opening up to me, even if it’s only a little.

Do you think Alexander is that bad?

I used to think of Alexander as a womanizer and a flirt. His way of living is so alien to me that I can’t put myself in his shoes to even begin to understand him. Could you?

I know only a little bit about him. Not like we spend hours talking about his past.

I have to say that I am thankful to him for helping me stay in college and for paying the bills. When my head was up in the clouds, without my knowing, he was taking care of all the necessities. So, no, he’s not all that bad but he is still an ass at times.

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